5 Years Later_a second chance romance novel Read online

  The call went dead.

  I stared at the laptop screen.

  I was completely and utterly fucked.

  “Good morning, flower.”

  I turned and saw Aiden standing in the doorway. Wearing nothing but jeans. The V-cut of muscle that sank into his jeans was enough to wash away anything bad. I quickly stood up and grinned.

  He was worth everything.

  Somewhere in the recesses of my mind was the mature version of myself, screaming that I was making a huge mistake. That I was letting Aiden ruin my life. But it was my decision to skip work and fuck around with him.

  “What are we doing today?” he asked.

  I stared him up and down like he was a slab of meat.

  I had discovered the beautiful power of using sex as a way to distract myself from life and hide my pain. I had never played with drugs (which was a shock, considering where I came from), but Aiden was becoming my drug. I craved him in a way I never craved anything in my life.

  I dropped the robe on the floor and walked toward him with purpose.

  He wrapped his arms around me and lifted me up. He kissed me. His warm morning breath was sexy. He smelled like comfortable sleep.

  “Fuck, sweetheart, what are we doing here?” Aiden whispered. “Don’t you have work?”

  “I just got off the phone with work,” I said. “I took care of things. Now fuck my brains out.”

  Aiden turned and carried me to the bed.

  He dropped me down and put his mouth to my left breast. He sucked at me, engulfing my nipple, the tip of his tongue darting left to right against my nipple. I arched my back and groaned, sliding my fingers into his hair. I dug my fingers into him, groaning louder, losing myself as he ran his hands down the sides of my body, grabbing the top of my panties, and peeling them down my legs and off. His right hand cut up between my legs, touching my wetness, two fingers making themselves welcome as they plunged into me. When he curled his fingers, I sat up forward with a whimper and nudged at his head, wanting to kiss him.

  Aiden pulled away from my breast, his teeth coming together against my nipple hard enough to make me scream.

  Then he grinned an evil smile that made me shiver between my thighs, his fingers still inside me, moving with force, making my hips buck to his touch.

  He then came forward and kissed me. I grabbed his face, scratching the scuff on his cheeks. I needed his mouth, his tongue, everything he had to offer. If I was going to lose everything great in my life, then I wanted something greater. And that something was Aiden.

  I slipped my right hand behind between our bodies. I felt the perfect muscle of his body as it trailed all the way down. I grabbed his wrist and pushed him away from me. I didn’t want his fingers. I wanted his cock.

  My hands gently slid along his hard shaft, feeling all that steel-like definition. From root to crown, I paused and played against the sensitive tip of his cock. He was so thick and full, so ready for me.

  I grabbed him halfway down his shaft and put him between my legs.

  Aiden was quick to thrust, entering me. I moved my hand to his stomach, gasping as the sudden and wonderful feeling of pressure blossomed within me.

  I bit his bottom lip and pulled away. He put his forehead to mine. With a grunt and a heavy thrust forward, Aiden buried himself inside me. He went to the hilt, stealing my breath, an endless sense of pleasure racing through my body.

  I put my hands to his firm ass and pulled him in.

  “Harder,” I groaned into his ear. “Harder, Aiden. Fucking harder.”

  I was going crazy, and it was the kind of crazy I wanted. I couldn’t get enough. It couldn’t feel any better, but I wanted it to. It only took him a minute to bring me to orgasm, too. I threw my legs around him and held there, rocking my hips as I throbbed and came. Trying to scream through breathless yells.

  Aiden scooped me up off the bed and did something crazy. He stood up, holding me, still inside me. He walked me to the wall, his hands holding my ass.

  Slamming our bodies against the wall, Aiden gritted his teeth and locked his eyes to mine.

  He pulled back and thrust at me. “That’s how you like it? Is that fucking hard enough yet?”

  “No,” I whimpered.

  Oh, but it was so good. So hard. So taut. Yes!

  “No? Give me your fucking wrists right now, Lily.”

  He was growling at me. That deep, rough voice matching the deep, rough man that I was so madly in love with.

  “Above your fucking head,” he ordered me.

  I slowly put my hands above my head. Aiden grabbed my wrists with one hand. He held them there tight. His other hand still held my ass, keeping me steady.

  He fucked me. Against the wall. As hard as he could. Reaching depths I never felt before, never knew I had. Each time he pounded forward, I let out a groan of pleasure. Of relief. Of everything that waited outside the bedroom.

  His hold on my wrists was fiercely tight. And he fucked me until I started to come again.

  “Aiden,” I groaned. “Fuck…I give up…I give up…”

  Aiden thrust forward and held there, my sex clenching tight against his beautiful cock. Memorizing my body as I was memorizing the sheer length and thickness of him.

  He didn’t let up, either. He just held me there, staring at me.

  He kissed me and put his lips to my ear.

  “I fucking love you, Lily. I’ve always loved you. I always will love you. You fucking remember that, no matter what. There will never be another you, Lily. My flower. My forever.”

  I wiggled my hands, and he let his grip slack on my wrists.

  I grabbed at his shoulders and pushed.

  I wanted off that wall. I wanted back on the bed.

  Aiden stepped back until he hit the bed. Then he fell down to his back, putting me on top of him. My hands spread across his strong chest, and I held there tight as I started to fuck him. It was my turn to love his body. My turn to make him come.

  His hands touched everywhere on me. From my hips to my sides to my breasts, up to my face, where he grabbed me and pulled me down to kiss him. He started to fuck again, thrusting up at me as I fucked him.

  We were in sync together.

  We were perfect together.

  But our time together was down to mere hours…

  Chapter 11

  (I Shouldn’t Have Done That)

  10 YEARS AGO

  (AIDEN)

  Something was off.

  After Lily rode me until my dick nearly exploded, she collapsed to the bed, looking away, just lying there. I thought maybe she fell asleep, but she hadn’t. She was just staring at the door, hair in her face.

  I got myself a cup of coffee and returned to the bedroom. I hit the floor and put my back against the end of the bed. I could feel her soft breath against my shoulder and neck.

  “Last time I saw you like this, you were thinking way too much about your father,” I said and sipped my coffee.

  “Sorry,” she said.

  I looked back at her. “Hey. What is it?”

  “You just feel so good on me. In me. All around me. In my life.”

  “You’re the same for me, flower.”

  She grinned. “But we need to figure out what we’re doing.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You’ve played a handful of solo shows, Aiden. Is that what you want? Does that make money?”

  “I’m surviving,” he said. “Is this about me crashing here, Lily? I can find something…”

  “No,” she said. “I love you here. It’s not that at all. Well, I mean…”

  “What is it?”

  “I just haven’t been committed to work,” she said.

  “Damn, sweetheart. I told you not to fuck that up.”

  “You told me. Right. My master.”

  “What?”

  “Nothing.”

  “Whoa. What’s going on?”

  “You broke my heart for five years,” she said. “And now y
ou’re back. And…I just can’t figure out what this means. I mean, it’s been a crazy few weeks together, Aiden. I don’t want that to end. I don’t want anything in life but you.”

  I turned and got on one knee and brushed the hair out of her face. “Oh, Lily. My flower. Shit, sweetheart. I love this with you. I love you. But you can’t hurt your career. We can make this work, however you want. Yeah, I did get paid for those gigs. They weren’t for much. But enough. I can figure out my shit. I need you to keep your shit going, though. Don’t give it all up because of me.”

  “What if I already did?” she asked, biting her lip.

  “Then we fix it. Come on. Right now. We fix it.”

  “Fix it how?” she asked me.

  I had no fucking clue, other than taking her to the office and making her work. I figured she would maybe jump up and show a little care for her job. Damn. A job with a paycheck and benefits. That was a good thing. And she was squandering it because of me. Fuck, that made me love her.

  I stroked her cheek. “Lily, you can’t…”

  “Don’t tell me what I can’t,” she snapped. “I waited a long time for you. I never got over you.”

  “I never got over you, either.”

  “You never came to see me. Your band never toured here?”

  I hung my head. “I wasn’t in a good state.”

  “And you are now?”

  “My head’s clear,” I said. “Okay? I’m leaving that music shit behind me. I’ll play my solo gigs. I’ll grab a job. I’m fine.”

  “Music has always been…”

  “Lily, why are you so worried about me?”

  She looked me dead in the eyes and said the worse thing I had ever heard in my life.

  “Because I don’t want you to leave me again.”

  She wept in my arms, and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I couldn’t take back five years. I couldn’t take back splitting in the middle of the night to chase my dream of stardom. I couldn’t take back a damn thing. And there wasn’t a thing I could say to make it up to her, either.

  After she cried, she slept. I held her tight until she woke up half an hour later.

  “I shouldn’t have done that,” she whispered.

  “You should have,” I said. I kissed her forehead. “You deserved that. To get that out. There’s nothing I could ever do or say.”

  She touched my face, tracing it as she smiled. “It’s worth whatever happens.”

  “Don’t say that,” I said. “That’s pressure on me, sweetheart. I’m best taken at face value.”

  “Meaning?”

  “Meaning you need to live your life,” I said.

  My phone rang out in the apartment. I kissed her and got out of bed, leaving her to think about what I’d just said to her.

  It was Jake calling me.

  I cringed when I took the call.

  “Make a decision?” he asked, getting to the point.

  “I already did,” I said. “It’s not working, Jake. The guys are out on tour. I’ll sign off on my share of everything. I want out.”

  “You’re the voice,” he said. “You write the songs. The lyrics. They’re just a cover band without you!”

  “They can keep the songs, too.”

  “Are you serious about this?”

  “Yes.”

  “Why?”

  “I just am,” I said. “I just am.”

  “I know it’s been hard,” Jake said. “But we’ve gotten interest. There’s opportunity coming. New ways to make money. I’ve been talking to video game developers, movie producers, all that. You never know when a song will hit.”

  “Good for the guys,” I said. “I want out.”

  “You’re being a prick.”

  “I’ve lived in a van for five years and have not much to show for it.”

  “Living in a van? That’s more than what you had when you met me.”

  “Fuck you, Jake.”

  “You know what? Fine. This is what you want. I’ll get the lawyers to draw up papers and this shit is done.”

  “Don’t be bitter, Jake.”

  “Fuck you, Aiden. I invested a lot of time and money into you. The band. The music. Now I’m left with a cover band.”

  “Not my fucking fault or problem.”

  “Yeah? You want to push at me? How about I sue you? Huh? I’ll get you for something.”

  “What are you going to take from me? I barely own a thing. Thanks to you and your shitty management.”

  “Eat shit, Aiden.”

  “You’ve been feeding shit to me for years, Jake.”

  “Sign the fucking papers when they come. And maybe I won’t sue your ass.”

  Jake hung up on me.

  I squeezed the cell phone and gritted my teeth. Jake knew that was coming. I loved my bandmates, I really did. But their life was far from mine. I wanted to create moments and memories for people, not make enough to buy coke to stuff up my nose like I was a teddy bear being stuffed to go home with a little kid.

  “Fuck,” I growled.

  “What’s wrong?”

  I turned and saw Lily. She was dressed. Pulling her hair back. Looking as beautiful as I could ever remember.

  Then I blurted out something crazy. “We should get fucking married and say fuck this place and go.”

  “What?”

  “You heard me.”

  There was a knock at the door.

  I ignored it.

  “We leave it all behind,” I said. “This fucking town. This place. Everything. Just make it up as we go along.”

  “You just got done saying I need to keep my job…”

  “Fuck…” I gritted my teeth. “Lily…”

  There was another knock.

  I walked to the door. I opened it and a man stood there holding what look like a brochure.

  “Hey, man, we’re new-”

  I shut the door.

  The guy knocked again. Then he pounded.

  I looked at Lily.

  “Aiden, you’re upset,” she said. “You need to take a breath. Think about what you’re saying. Who was that on the phone?”

  “Jake. It’s over. For good. No more music. I gave it up for good. But Lily…”

  “Jesus, Aiden,” she said. “Look at this entire thing for a second. How crazy it all is.”

  “You were just fucking crying,” I yelled. “Looking half dead. I’m trying to make you happy!”

  The pounding at the door kept going.

  I ripped the door open.

  “Get the fuck out of here,” I said.

  “No,” the guy said. “You’re going to listen to me.”

  A fuse blew in my head.

  For some reason, the floodgates decided to open and I was out for blood. I grabbed the guy by the shirt and pulled him nose to nose.

  “Aiden!” Lily yelled.

  She ran and grabbed at me, pulling me back.

  “Jesus, man,” the guy said.

  I let him go and shoved him back. He dropped his brochures and looked rattled.

  He fumbled for his phone. “I’m calling the police!”

  I shut the door and faced Lily.

  “Aiden.”

  “Lily.”

  She kissed me. It was fire. It was passion.

  I grabbed her waist and pulled her close to my body.

  A second later, there was that fucking knocking again.

  I pushed her away.

  She clawed at my arms. “Ignore it.”

  I should have listened to her.

  But I felt like I was losing everything. That giant build up only to get let down. Like sitting on the steps waiting for my old man to show up. But he never showed up. He never did a fucking thing for me.

  The anger was boiling.

  Lily was going to get in trouble at work. I had no fucking money because of the fucking band. Jake was going to sue me.

  I opened the door again.

  The guy waved a phone in my face.

  I didn’t k
now he was recording me.

  “Cops are on their way,” he said. “Assault!”

  “Assault,” I growled. “You want to see assault, asshole.”

  “Aiden!” Lily yelled again.

  I looked back at her.

  Her face told the story.

  Disappointment. Hurt. Let down.

  I didn’t even really think about her life before I came crashing back into it. I just came and showed up. I put myself in the way. I took over.

  I was sorry.

  I was so fucking sorry.

  I grabbed the guy by the shirt again and this time I threw a tight fist, connecting with his face.

  That was the first of many punches.

  Lily screamed.

  I beat the hell out of some stranger for knocking on the door.

  And the cops really were on their way.

  Chapter 12

  (Totally Fired)

  10 YEARS AGO

  (LILY)

  I jumped on Aiden’s back. He almost fell forward, smashing into the wall. That was the only way I could get him to stop hitting the guy at my door. Whether the guy should have been there or not didn’t matter. Aiden beating the hell out of him did matter.

  Aiden shook me off his back. I stumbled backward and hit the doorway to my apartment.

  “He pushed you!” the guy yelled from the floor, blood covering his face. “I saw it! I saw it!”

  Aiden pulled a fist back.

  The guy balled himself up and started to groan.

  When Aiden turned, the look in his eyes hit me hard. He was angry. He was hurt. He was guilty.

  I was in shock. My hands behind my back, hugging the doorway from behind. My heart was in my throat. My mouth was moving, but I couldn't get a word out.

  Aiden slipped into the apartment and walked to the kitchen sink. He washed the blood off his hands down the drain and then dried his hands on a paper towel. Then he turned and folded his arms.

  “Whatever I have here you can keep,” he said. “Cash in my bag. I’ll jot down my bank account info, too. You can keep it all.”